The diet bet starts tomorrow. I'm all weighed in, but not quite ready to go. I need to get groceries and do some food prep, but I haven't even started on my work for the day so I'm not sure when I'll get to the grocery store. Scheduling. Priorities. Put those on my goals list.
Some other things on my goals list:
Don't drink my calories. Stick to water.
Work out.
A little meal prep so I don't get so hungry I blow it.
Minimize time reading and watching the news because it paralyzes me.
Not weight related, I have to get focused on school work this week. Last week definitely slipped away after the dog biting incident. I'm still in a funk, I still am doing the bare minimum of work, but I've written out a work schedule and I'm just going to stick to it. Just sit there and put in the hours, even if my head isn't completely in it.
I did go to my neighbor's for the first time yesterday. I didn't realize the dog was still there. She goes home today. She really is the sweetest thing. She remembered me and crawled right in my lap. My neighbor said the dog snapped at her nephew when he leaned in to kiss her. The dog was sitting right next to her when it happened. She doesn't think she'll watch the dog again. It breaks my heart because I love the dog, she just needs a little extra awareness when people get in her space. I'm trying to be less involved with my neighbor, so I didn't say anything. I didn't want to be involved in this whole dog business in the first place. I regret the day I met this lady.
Okay. Time to get to work. I'm going to make this a good week.
Sunday, February 26, 2017
Wednesday, February 22, 2017
two oh six
My first weigh in on my new scale put me at 206, which is four pounds less than I thought I was, but I also hadn't eaten in 48 hours. That's all changed now. My appetite has come back with a vengeance!
My weight ticker is supposed to go here. Why won't it post correctly?!
<a href="https://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wdaoyPs/">
<img border="0" src="https://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/t/wdaoyPs/weight.png"></a>
I joined a Dietbet. I never thought I'd join one of these. I hate deadlines and PRESSURE... but I love the people that are hosting this bet. And I was planning on losing the weight anyway, so I thought I'd try it out. I need to lose 4% of my body weight in a month to get my money back. So that's 8 or 9 pounds, I think... I'm so terrible at math. The diet bet starts next week.
Dog drama update.
Instead of not being able to sleep, now all I do is sleep. The neighbor I was walking the dog for is really pissing me off. She wasn't there and she's telling me it was no big deal, everyone understands, et cetera, et cetera.
Today she asked me if I was coming over to walk her dogs because she hurt her leg and can't get out of bed. #1. I don't want to leave my house. #2. I don't want to walk dogs ever again, but definitely not today.
I don't know if I should just say, "I can't come over today. Sorry." Or... no. I think that's what I need to do. I've needed to set boundaries with this lady for a long time. I'm terrible at setting boundaries. I feel bad for her. That's why I was helping her out. But walking dogs and going outside is beyond what I am capable of right now.
This whole thing has thrown off my schedule. It's 4:30 and I haven't even started my work for today. I will probably be working until 2 or 3 in the morning which screws me up for the next day.
I need to GET IT TOGETHER!!!
My weight ticker is supposed to go here. Why won't it post correctly?!
<a href="https://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wdaoyPs/">
<img border="0" src="https://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/t/wdaoyPs/weight.png"></a>
I joined a Dietbet. I never thought I'd join one of these. I hate deadlines and PRESSURE... but I love the people that are hosting this bet. And I was planning on losing the weight anyway, so I thought I'd try it out. I need to lose 4% of my body weight in a month to get my money back. So that's 8 or 9 pounds, I think... I'm so terrible at math. The diet bet starts next week.
Dog drama update.
Instead of not being able to sleep, now all I do is sleep. The neighbor I was walking the dog for is really pissing me off. She wasn't there and she's telling me it was no big deal, everyone understands, et cetera, et cetera.
Today she asked me if I was coming over to walk her dogs because she hurt her leg and can't get out of bed. #1. I don't want to leave my house. #2. I don't want to walk dogs ever again, but definitely not today.
I don't know if I should just say, "I can't come over today. Sorry." Or... no. I think that's what I need to do. I've needed to set boundaries with this lady for a long time. I'm terrible at setting boundaries. I feel bad for her. That's why I was helping her out. But walking dogs and going outside is beyond what I am capable of right now.
This whole thing has thrown off my schedule. It's 4:30 and I haven't even started my work for today. I will probably be working until 2 or 3 in the morning which screws me up for the next day.
I need to GET IT TOGETHER!!!
Tuesday, February 21, 2017
four year anniversary
February 19th was my four year anniversary for getting my sleeve. I missed it because I was experiencing one of the most distressing events of my life. Well, let's say it's in the Top 8 of most distressing. That sounds so dramatic! Well, it was to me. I know it's not that big compared to what's going on the world, but I can't get a grasp on any perspective right now.
Long story short: I was walking a dog for my neighbor so she could go see her uncle, and one of the neighborhood kids got bit.
In the end it's all been worked out. It was a very superficial wound. The kid's parents are being reimbursed by my neighbor's insurance. There were no police involved. The neighborhood is secretly on my side because they know the kid is a monster and they've all had dealings with him. The kid's mom has told me everything is fine.
It's over. Everything is okay.
But I still feel very upset. There are so many things I wish I would've done differently, especially how it was handled afterwards. I keep obsessing about it. I can't sleep. I keep replaying it over in my mind. I have this horrible headache that won't go away. I don't want to leave the house. I feel like I failed the dog. Even though I want to kill the kid, I feel terrible that I didn't keep him safe. I keep crying. I don't want to walk dogs anymore, not even my own. My sister has had to walk our dog, and I feel ridiculous and useless.
I guess the one good thing is I lost my appetite. I never knew what that meant before! I hadn't eaten in a day in a half, so it was real, physical hunger, but my head was like, "I can't eat right now." That's never happened before. I didn't drink much either... maybe that explains my headache.
I know I need to crawl out of this.
First weigh in on my new scale tomorrow.
Long story short: I was walking a dog for my neighbor so she could go see her uncle, and one of the neighborhood kids got bit.
In the end it's all been worked out. It was a very superficial wound. The kid's parents are being reimbursed by my neighbor's insurance. There were no police involved. The neighborhood is secretly on my side because they know the kid is a monster and they've all had dealings with him. The kid's mom has told me everything is fine.
It's over. Everything is okay.
But I still feel very upset. There are so many things I wish I would've done differently, especially how it was handled afterwards. I keep obsessing about it. I can't sleep. I keep replaying it over in my mind. I have this horrible headache that won't go away. I don't want to leave the house. I feel like I failed the dog. Even though I want to kill the kid, I feel terrible that I didn't keep him safe. I keep crying. I don't want to walk dogs anymore, not even my own. My sister has had to walk our dog, and I feel ridiculous and useless.
I guess the one good thing is I lost my appetite. I never knew what that meant before! I hadn't eaten in a day in a half, so it was real, physical hunger, but my head was like, "I can't eat right now." That's never happened before. I didn't drink much either... maybe that explains my headache.
I know I need to crawl out of this.
First weigh in on my new scale tomorrow.
Friday, February 17, 2017
I'm back
I'm back! And I just figured out my password for this blog and was able to sign in. I found the below post in my drafts folder. I never posted it because it felt so negative, but it was the truth. I was very much on my own and I had a hard time finding support and I wasn't successful.
But I'm back now. Coming up on my four year sleeve-a-versary. A lot has happened, and there's a lot I want to do. I'm ready to get back on track.
I'll write a big update later, but for now I just wanted to officially check in.
**********************
I'm not sure of the date of this post.
I haven't been focused on my weight at all. I've been focused on school and my speed classes and that's not doing me any good because there are three weeks left in the quarter and I'm not going to pass. I will have to repeat those classes. This isn't unusual in the court reporting world, but it's very frustrating to devote all my time, energy, and focus into moving forward and still not make any progress.
I went to my regular doctor this past week and he was very excited about my 55 lb loss, but I was like eh. It should be at least 75 lbs. I've barely done anything in the last two months to better my health or stay away from crap food.
I've been seeing posts about people going for their six month check up, their nine month checkup. The last time i went to my surgeon's office was one month post-op and that's it. So I called to see if I needed to do any follow up and they said after the one month they don't need to ever see me again, except maybe once a year, but that's up to me. I was like, gee, thanks for caring.
I know I need to do this on my own, but a little support from the professionals in this field would be nice. I really thought when I I have no motivation and I have a million questions about nutrition that I would like to ask. I need to find a support group and maybe a nutritionist that specializes in bariatric. I live near a major city so you'd think it wouldn't be this freaking hard.
But I'm back now. Coming up on my four year sleeve-a-versary. A lot has happened, and there's a lot I want to do. I'm ready to get back on track.
I'll write a big update later, but for now I just wanted to officially check in.
**********************
I'm not sure of the date of this post.
I haven't been focused on my weight at all. I've been focused on school and my speed classes and that's not doing me any good because there are three weeks left in the quarter and I'm not going to pass. I will have to repeat those classes. This isn't unusual in the court reporting world, but it's very frustrating to devote all my time, energy, and focus into moving forward and still not make any progress.
I went to my regular doctor this past week and he was very excited about my 55 lb loss, but I was like eh. It should be at least 75 lbs. I've barely done anything in the last two months to better my health or stay away from crap food.
I've been seeing posts about people going for their six month check up, their nine month checkup. The last time i went to my surgeon's office was one month post-op and that's it. So I called to see if I needed to do any follow up and they said after the one month they don't need to ever see me again, except maybe once a year, but that's up to me. I was like, gee, thanks for caring.
I know I need to do this on my own, but a little support from the professionals in this field would be nice. I really thought when I I have no motivation and I have a million questions about nutrition that I would like to ask. I need to find a support group and maybe a nutritionist that specializes in bariatric. I live near a major city so you'd think it wouldn't be this freaking hard.
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